Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Infertility is not a "journey" - it's a broken down bus

I hate when people call the process of infertility a journey. 
Infertility. Barrenness. Inability to have a baby - is a muddy, stagnant hole of pain and disappointment. There is no movement, as in a journey, but as I titled this post, there is the exact opposite - infertility is an anti-journey. You have forgotten what momentum feels like. At times you have the illusion of forward steps, acceleration even, but "life's illusions I recall" is all it is. A mirage. 
After two and a half years of infertility (tests, scans, surgery, pills, needles, therapy & disappointment) I have decided to share some of my wisdom. From the bus broken down on the side of the road. Flat tyres. Absent driver. Bung engine. I cannot give you the magical potion promised to vulnerable infertiles everywhere we look - I don't have it! If I did I would have a child. But I can share my experience & hope that you, my fellow passengers, feel comfort from company.

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